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20 Questions for Blair

Posted by on October 24, 2005

I was recently reading another blog, and I ran across this neat little idea. Do you remember those junior high parties when you used to play Truth or Dare? Well, this is similar to that… it is time for “20 Questions for Blair.”

I promise to answer the next twenty questions posted to me in the comments section of this post. No matter how off the wall, outlandish, theological, or personal they may be… I will answer them…. honestly.

Leaving a question is simple. All you have to do is click on the comments link above, right under the line “Posted by Blair.” Fill out the comment form with your question, including your name and email address (which will not be published), then click on “Submit Comment.”

So who will be first?

43 Responses to 20 Questions for Blair

  1. Allison

    Hey Mr.A! I love reading your writing. You are so awesome!!

  2. Blair

    Thanks, Allison….

    And let me clarify…. I am only answering the first twenty. Please don’t ask twenty questions all at once… :)

  3. Mary

    1.) how did you know you wanted to be a teacher?
    2.) have you ever done some ludacris thing like sneek out and go to parties as a kid?
    3.) did you enjoy having me as a student? (duh the answer is obvious…i’m the coolest
    4.) instead of you always helping us out…would you ever let us help you out?
    5.) umm…how about we ditch school one day and you take me and heathre out to eat?? sound good?!

  4. Blair

    Good questions, Mary! Let’s see how many I can answer before I have to go and put Chloe in bed. (Miranda took Jordyn to Wal-Mart!)

    1) Have you ever seen the Bugs Bunny cartoon where Bugs pops his head out of the ground in some crazy location and says, “I knew I shouldn’t have taken that turn in Albuquerque?” as if he is now completely lost and has no idea how he ended up where he is? I sometimes feel that way.

    In college, I struggled with a major. I knew I was called to ministry, but I was struggling with what that meant exactly. Fifteen years later, I still am. As I pondered my possibilities, I realized I had a deep passion for people… and for helping them. After a couple of false starts and more changes in majors than you can imagine, I ended up choosing Secondary Education with a concentration in language arts. This seemed like a good fit… I enjoy older students oh-so-much more than younger ones, and I am deeply passionate about my content area. (I have minors in chemistry, French, and psychology… but I wouldn’t want to teach any of those things.)

    Okay… off to put Coco in bed… but I shall be back later to finish up Mary’s questions.

  5. GÜNTER

    6)Seriously, name one dumb, stupid thing you did as a kid
    7)what did you think of me when you first met me?
    8)when you were a kid dd you ever feel like you just couldn’t get close to your family?
    9)do you ever get frustrated with teaching to the point of thinking about not teaching anymore?
    10)when you ditch school and take me and mary to get buffalo wings will you wear that football on your head?

  6. Blair

    Okay, I will be back to answering questions in a few…. but so far, Mary and Gunter are dominating the questions. Any other takers?

  7. Alicia

    1)what did you think of me when you met me ?
    2)what has been the highlight of your year ?

    I have to go eat right now but as im eatting i will be thinking of questions !!

    - alicia !

  8. Blair

    Okay… back to Mary’s questions:

    2) I will assume you meant anthing ludicrous. Ludacris is a rap star, and I don’t know that I have ever done anything that would be anything like him. I am also going to combine this with question #6 of Gunter’s.

    I pulled more stupid, asinine stunts as a teenager growing up than I would ever care to remember. My dad’s lectures always included some comment about how he wished he could understand what I was thinking when I did whatever the most recent transgression had been. In hindsight, I realize the problem was I really DIDN’T think. In fact, I have often said if I write an autobiography focusing on my growing-up years, I would title it “It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time.”

    One of the biggest bonehead stunts I pulled was a scheme that went on for months. My parents’ phone bill was paid automatically through my dad’s business checking account, and he didn’t keep a really close eye on that account. He knew if it had $60,000 or $600, but he didn’t keep a close watch.

    At the time, I was dating a girl that lived out of town. Because I enjoyed talking to her so much, I would just call whenever I felt like it. The phone bill the first month was well over a hundred dollars… I know because I got it out of the mailbox and hid it. When I didn’t get busted and the bill got paid, I did it again. This went on for months. The highest the bill ever got was about $400… for one month! Needless to say, when I got caught, I got in more trouble than I care to remember. In fact, I am not sure if they have put my name back in the will.

    More to follow…

  9. Blair

    3) I am combining Mary’s question with Gunter’s #7 and Alicia’s #1. I will also not answer this one about anyone else…. except maybe by email.

    Mary, as a student in my class, you were more quiet and subdued than you are now. As I have told you, you seem a lot more comfortable in your own skin this year. I enjoyed having you park in my class during Driver’s Ed. a whole heck of a lot… and I am glad you did, because it gave me the chance to get to know you better.

    Gunter, I have already told you who you remind me of. My first conscious memory of you was formed when you took out a homework notebook and wrote down an assignment I was giving. I was immediately impressed by the responsibility you were demonstrating.

    Alicia, you are one of the single most attentive students I have ever taught. My first impression was that you were listening so intently and watching so closely that I wondered if my fly was open or if there was a booger in my nose. :)

    Miranda and Jordyn are back…. let me go brush Jordyn’s teeth and I will be back.

  10. the wifey

    Looking back over your life, what is your greatest regret? And don’t give us the, “I have learned from everything & so I don’t have any regrets” speech……

  11. Blair

    4) instead of you always helping us out…would you ever let us help you out?

    You have no idea how asking such a question helps me, for asking such a question expresses love, concern, and caring. That, or you just fake it really well. :)

    My students help me more than they realize in ways they can’t imagine. Whether it is one of the members of the homecoming court thanking me for all that I had done (and only one did), or it’s a student who always says “Have a nice day, Mr. A.” before he leaves my class, you help.

    As for life issues… now is my time to give to you guys. When you get older, you can give back. Maybe you can give back to me, but probably not. I mean, if I teach long enough, I would love to be celebrated like Mr. Holland was at the end of Mr. Holland’s Opus (a great movie, by the way). But let’s face it… that is a movie, and things like that don’t happen in real life.

    Instead, my students will give back to me by giving to others. What I have invested in them, they will, in turn, invest in others. Kind of like that movie, Pay it Forward. Or, better yet…. similar to the ministry of a carpenter from Galilee. He poured His life into people, who poured their lives into people… and changed the world by doing so. Maybe I am changing the world one student at a time.

    5) umm…how about we ditch school one day and you take me and heathre out to eat?? sound good?!

    when you ditch school and take me and mary to get buffalo wings will you wear that football on your head?

    How about if we get a big group of us and go watch the new Harry Potter movie when it comes out? Miranda doesn’t want to see it, and I do…. would that work instead? And maybe we could go eat before the movie.

    And since we would be going to a movie, I don’t think I should wear the football… people behind me wouldn’t be able to see. And for the record, I wore it last week on School Spirit Day of homecoming week. What can I say? I am one of the few teachers dedicated enough to do such a thing!

    And for the record, I just counted and we have nine legit, separate questions so far. I am accepting 20… so if you have one, submit it!

  12. Sara

    In the interest of not writing my paper, I’ll ask a question.

    In your opinion, what is your single best funny family story? I’ve heard a lot, but I’m curious as to what your favorite is.

    One more question. Which grammatical error irks you the most?

  13. Mary

    Harry Potter sounds fabulous to me

  14. David Russell

    Has anything unexpected happened (pleasant or not) as a result of blogging?

  15. GÜNTER

    Harry Potter is an excellent idea!

  16. Sarah (( pale girl ))

    How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood ?

    and
    Are you jealous of me because im white ?

  17. Blair

    From Heathre:

    6) When you were a kid did you ever feel
    like you just couldn’t get close to your family?

    We need to define the terms here. If by “kid” you mean a child, then no, not really. If by “kid” you mean a teenager… then yeah, pretty often. To a certain extent, I think this is universal. I think many teenagers end up feeling this way. As we enter our teen years, the normal yearnings for independence seem to grow stronger. At the same time, our parents’ desire for us to stay young forever is also growing. The two desires are in obvious conflict… and sometimes the relationships are strained as a result. Does that make sense? It does in my head. :)

    7) Do you ever get frustrated with teaching to the point of thinking about not teaching anymore?

    Only every day. Two years after I first entered the classroom, I left, swearing I would never return. Two years after that… I was right back in the classroom. I have tried on numerous occsions to quit, but for whatever reason, it just doesn’t seem to happen.

    There are so many frustrating things about my job that I often feel like I could spend a day in my backyard banging my head against a pine tree instead of going to work…. and my day would be only slightly more frustrating if I were to do so. At the same time, I know that I am where I need to be… at least for now.

    You see, I am convinced that the right place for any of us in the place where our greatest gifts meet the world’s greatest needs. The fact is, I am pretty good at what I do. I know there is room for improvement; there are many things I could do with a greater degree of excellence. But, I am a good teacher. My students know that I care, and I am able to teach oh-so-much more than just language skills.

    I often make comments to Miranda about how I just can’t see myself sticking with teaching long enough to retire from it. Sometimes, she laughs and says that she can imagine me saying that 25 years from now… still as a teacher.

    The fact is, there is a huge part of me that feels like I am supposed to ministering in a vocational kind of way. Right now, I just don’t know how to flesh that out. Frankly, I am not really sure that a church exists in this area that has the same kinds of burdens and passions that I have. I am not sure that I am a really good match for the area churches. Does that mean we are supposed to move? To start a new church? To just make it work at a church that doesn’t seem like a good fit? I have no idea.

    I am 34, and I have no idea what I want to be when I get big.

    From Alicia:

    8) What has been the highlight of your year?

    I am not sure if it has happened yet. I think the highlight might end up being my trip to London during Spring Break, but so far, I am not sure.

    I suppose if I were pressed for an answer, I would have to say that Homecoming Week would be a highlight. A lot of hard work went into last week, and most of the students seemed to enjoy it. Since a lot of the responsibility falls on my shoulders, I am relieved that it went so smoothly… especially since I made some changes this year. Hopefully next year will be bigger and better!

    More to come later…

  18. Ashley Whitus

    Sorry Mr. A! I don’t have a question for you but I wasn’t sure if you would read this if I put it anywhere else so I just posted it here. I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed your class. I looked forward to it each and every day. You always had good stories to tell us. And your stories were different from all the other ones. Your stories really made an impact in me. You made things so easy to understand and learn. I’m having a hard time putting everything into the right words but I just want you to know that you’re doing a great job. Though it may not always seem like it, you do reach some people and you DO make a difference. I hope you don’t ever feel like you don’t. **I enjoyed having you as a teacher so much, I always make sure I’m the one who brings you the notes, when I’m an office aid. Thanks Mr. A!! **Ashley Whitus**

  19. Sarah C.

    Sooo, Mr. A….. Yeah you don’t really know me that well yet, but since I tend to talk to teachers in an informal manner during and out of school, I think that shall change soon enough. Anyway, My question: Besides the select few who you are inclined to always mention, has there ever been a student that you regret not getting to know? And 2) Are there any students that you have this year who you think have something (personality) That’s really unique, yet u just don’t kno?
    P.S. You’re jealous….I’m foreign….HAH! tehe

  20. bybo

    alright there buddy, i got a question for you

    what is something you dream of doing but to this point have never told anyone, even miranda?

    haha…..how you like them apples ;)

  21. Miranda the wifey

    Another question (still waiting on an answer to the other), what do you envision the “church” to look like? Your ideal church situation- including setting? people? worship? evangelism? pastor role? etc…..

  22. Sarah (( pale girl ))

    WHEN ARE YOU EVER GONNA ANSWER MY QUESTiON ??

  23. Blair

    Okay, okay…. be patient, people! I do have a life, you know!

    From my bride:
    9) Looking back over your life, what is your greatest regret? And don’t give us the, “I have learned from everything & so I don’t have any regrets” speech……

    Boy, does she know me well. She knew that I was going to try to cop out and use that speech. I have had to ponder that question.. and here is the best answer I have.

    If you know me well, or if you have read the series of posts entitled “My Journey (Parts 1 – ???), you know that life has not always been rosy in the Andress home. During the summer of 1999, I found myself separated from my bride. To sum up a long story, she had left me and filed for divorce. Obviously, six years and two beautiful little girls later, we are as happy as could be, but reconciliation took time.

    My greatest regret would have to be failing to be the husband that my wife desperately needed me to be. I fully believe that if I had been the man that I was called to be in the months that lead up to our separation, the separation would have never happened. As the one who is supposed to be the servant-leader of my home, I accept full responsibility for all that transpired and caused my beautiful bride to feel like she had no other option.

    I love where we are now, and if it took going down some dark roads to get to this destination, then it is certainly worth it. I just wish that I had been a better man. She deserved it.

  24. Blair

    From Sara:
    10)In your opinion, what is your single best funny family story? I’ve heard a lot, but I’m curious as to what your favorite is.

    Wow, that is tough. I have one, but I am not sure if the story lends itself to the written word. Frankly, to be fully appreciated, the story needs to be told by my sister, Kim. She has a unique perspective on this story, but since she isn’t here, I will try to do it justice.

    A couple of years before I got married, when I was still in college, I had a date. This was not just a date, mind you, it was a first date. I was supposed to pick up Tiffany Abbott at her home in Enterprise. From there, we were going to go to a wedding in Troy at the church I was serving, and after the wedding, we were going to come to Montgomery to go out to eat.

    At the time, I drove a 1984 Buick Park Avenue that looked a lot like this one. I had many affectionate names for this car that would seat 8 comfortably… the land yacht, my little ghetto sled… but I generally referred to it as my Hoopdee. That Saturday afternoon, I washed and waxed the Hoopdee, filled it up with gas, got a shower, and went to pick up Tiffany. The church was about a half hour or so from her house, and we had a pleasant enough conversation if my memory serves. About halfway to the church, I noticed cute little clouds of smoke seemed to be coming from the rear of my car. Dad has always stressed the importance of watching one’s gauges, so I did. They didn’t show a darn thing.

    About two-thirds of the way to the church, the cute white puffs of smoke became great big, black, billowing clouds. I was killing mosquitoes in three counties and doing irreversible harm to the ozone layer. I noticed that the gauges still showed that everything was fine, but even I, the single most mechanically-retarded person you know, could tell that the gauges were obviously missing something important. Where the heck is the Big Black Billowing Cloud Button, anyway?

    I pulled over to the side of the road and popped the hood. Sure enough, there it was… an engine. That is about all I could tell… except that it smelled pretty bad. I wasn’t sure what I had done, but I was pretty sure I was going to hear the phrase “burnt up an engine” later that evening from Dad.

    Some kind people picked us up and gave us a ride to the church. Everyone I knew in the community was at the church for the wedding anyway, and my parents had gone out of town for the day. I was pretty much stuck until after the wedding.

    I sat there during the whole wedding dreading the conversation I was going to have with my father. “Dad, do you remember my car?” “Yes, son.” “Dad… do you remember the engine that used to be in my car?”

    Tiffany was great. Throughout the whole wedding, she kept patting me on the hand and telling me that everything was going to be fine. She lied.

    After the wedding, we walked out the front of the church. One of the my deacons came up to me and told me, “Blair, that man over there is looking for you.” I looked in the direction he was pointing and didn’t recognize the man who was apparently looking for me.

    As I walked up to him, he asked “Are you Blair Andress?”

    “Yes, sir,” I replied.

    He continued with, “Did you leave a car parked down the road?”

    Oh, crap. I knew I had pulled the Hoopdee completely off the road, but somehow or another someone had hit it. Not only had I burnt up an engine, but someone had hit my Hoopdee. Dad was going to kill me.

    As soon as I could speak, I told him, “Yes, sir… I left my car down the road.”

    “Well, son…. it caught on fire and burnt up.”

    It caught on what and did what?

    The most intelligent question I could come up with was, “The whole thing? The whole car… burnt up?”

    “No, son… just the front half of it.”

    We got in this volunteer fireman’s truck, which smelled like a curious combination of fishbait and hot garbage. As he drove me AND MY DATE back towards the remains of the Hoopdee, all I could do was shake my head numbly. Tiffany had given up trying to reassure me.

    As we got closer, I could see the pillar of smoke. We came over a hill and around a curve, and there she was. The burnt remains of my Hoopdee. The front tires had exploded. The paint had been baked off the entire front half of the car. The front windshield was smoked up and cracked. In short, the Hoopdee had gone out in a blaze of glory.

    I ended up borrowing a car from a friend, and I took Tiffany with me back to my parents’ house. My parents weren’t home yet, but I wanted a witness with me. (I felt like Dad would be less likely to kill me if there was someone else around.) Once I was home, I called my sister, who lived next door. I tried to explain what had happened, but I struggled to get the words out. She finally figured out what I was talking about and told me to take Tiffany home. I did, and Kim came over to keep me company until my parents came home.

    Dad called before they actually made it home, and he could instantly tell something was wrong. When he asked, I told him, “Dad, we’ll talk when you get home.”

    “Son, I think you need to tell me now… so get started.”

    So I told him. I had just gotten to the part about the white puffs becoming big black clouds, and he interrupted me.

    “Crap, son… you burnt up an engine, didn’t you?”

    Kim literally fell in the floor as she laughed and told me, “That’s not all you burnt… tell him, Blair… tell him!”

    Obviously, Dad didn’t kill me. I assured him that I had kept check on the oil, coolant, and everything else I could possibly check. I convinced him that this was just a freak accident that defied all that we know about mechanical things. He convinced me that white puffs of smoke are bad, even if the gauges say otherwise.

    At this point, I have to explain why my sister’s version of this story is so much better than anything I can write. You see, when I started explaining what had happened, she totally misunderstood. I didn’t know this until years later, but for some reason, she got the impression that I was calling her because I had been on a date and had a horrible sexual experience. I am not sure exactly what she was thinking, but apparently her mind was in the gutter when I kept moaning and saying over and over… “Kim… the Hoopdee burnt! It burnt, Kim… I can’t believe it.” I am not sure what she thought the Hoopdee was, exactly… and I am not sure I want to know.

    When I began to tell her that I was scared of how Dad was going to react, she replied, “Now, Blair… you don’t have to tell them everything…”

    “Kim, I think he is smart enough to NOTICE!”

    “Not necessarily, Blair….”

    When she tells this story, she can draw it out forever. People that know Matt and me have a hard time believing it, but she really is the loudest of the three of us, and possibly the most dramatic as well.

    For the record… I never went out with Tiffany again.

  25. kanigaten

    what a first date…..

    well about my question,why did you decide to grow your hair out?

  26. Blair

    From Sara:
    11) One more question. Which grammatical error irks you the most?

    Believe it or not, I am not a grammar Nazi. I guess the best way for me to answer this is to say public errors from people who should know better. When I stumble across errors in papers, direct mail pieces, etc. I get irritated / amused.

    The most recent error that has somewhat grated my nerves has been at the church Miranda and I have been visiting. Somewhere along the way, the guy who prepares the Powerpoint for the sermons learned that “you” should be capitalized every time it is used in a church powerpoint. Not only does he do this when it refers to the Almighty, but he also does it every time that it appears. I wonder if anyone else even notices?

    From David:
    12) Has anything unexpected happened (pleasant or not) as a result of blogging?

    I am not sure that this counts as being unexpected, but it is the only answer I can come up with. Will that do?

    I have been a frustrated writer for years. Most often, I have been frustrated by the lack of time available for writing. Since I have had no regular audience, I didn’t make writing a priority. Now that I have a place to publish, I seem to be growing somewhat more disciplined. I am enjoying the opportunity to make thoughts somewhat more tangible.

    From Sarah (aka – Pale Girl):
    13) a. How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

    This is a questions that has puzzled pre-schoolers, zookeepers, and lumber workers for many years. The question is actually impossible to answer due to the many andefined variables. What type of wood are we talking about? I assume that certain types of wood would be more tasty to a woodchuck, and tastiness would certainly affect his appetite for chucking. What age is the wood in question? Wouldn’t a sapling be more moist than an older tree? Would that affect the appetite as well?

    I am sorry, but without more info, I simply can’t answer.

    13b. Are you jealous of me because im white?
    Though your complexion may, in fact, be creamy, you are not white. If you hold up a piece of copy paper, you will see what true white looks like. People only look like that if they have been dead for some time. Nor are people black. Go to Wal-Mart and check out the black shoe polish. People are only that color after being horribly burnt.

    I am sorry, but we are all just shades of grey.

    (Except for an African-American fraternity brother of mine. He was always quick to let people know that he wasn’t black… he said he had examined his complexion and determined that he was cocoa with a hint of nutmeg.)

    More answers coming later tonight… and for the record, I last counted 15 questions. This means some of you have a chance to toss out a question, but I will only accept five more. :)

  27. jennifer

    Mr. Andress, Im not sure if you remember me, but Im Jennifer Pulley, who was in your english class 2nd Semester last year, but I ended up moving. I would also like to let you know, that I really enjoyed your class, and I learned alot. All that is beside the point, but I got your blog from Heathre, and I had been checking it out so I figured I’d ask a question if that’s okay.

    In your class you talked alot about past teaching experiences, what would you say is the most fulfilling teaching experience you have had?

  28. Spanky

    I have three questions, Mr. Andress; will you oblige an answer to each? (Oops…that’s four.)

    1. I have heard that your nickname is FLIG; what does that stand for? Is there more than one meaning?

    2. Have you ever been fired from a job? If so, how many? More importantly, how many jobs have you NOT been fired from?

    3. And finally, have you ever written a concise answer? (just a little humor…no need to respond. You might run out of storage space… :-)

    As respectfully as I can muster,
    Your Pal,
    Spanky

  29. Amanda

    Who’s this Spanky guy? Do I know him? Does he have a friend named Pooch?

  30. Blair

    From Bybo:
    14) What is something you dream of doing but to this point have never told anyone, even miranda?

    To compete in the luge in the next Winter Olympics.

    From my bride:
    15) What do you envision the “church” to look like? Your ideal church situation- including setting? people? worship? evangelism? pastor role? etc…

    This is something that I have struggled with for the past several years, and Miranda knows it. I think finding the answer to this particular question might be more of a life-long pursuit.

    I am currently reading a book by Rob Bell titled Velvet Elvis. In it, there is a great description of the ideal church for me: “a group of people desperate to experience God.”

    I am not interested in all of the superfluous extras. What I am interested in is building authentic, transparent relationships with people who are committed to struggling well with life together. I am interested in sharing my journey with others… sharing the laughter and the tears, the joys and the heartaches. I would love nothing more than to be able to encourage others to pursue God in the way of Jesus.

    What is the setting? I am not sure. I can see many settings working, but none of them seem very church-y. There are advantages to a church owning a building, but there are also advantages for a church meeting in a coffee shop, peoples’ homes, etc.

    The people would be ebst characterized by one word: REAL.

    The worship: Would be a wonderful combination of the ancient, the old, and the new. Would be God-focused, not a performance. The purpose of a praise band is to be accompanists to those gathered as they sing to their Creator… this is not a performance for a human audience.

    Evangelism: Followers of Jesus are to be the physical presence of God in the world today. (What do you think the Bible means when it says that the Church is the body of Christ?) When belivers are loving those around them, serving those around them, living generously, experiencing true community and deep relationships… drawing others in is no problem.

    Pastor’s role: To lead by example. To be a cultural architect to help create a community where such relationships are possible. To be a visioncaster. To be a nurturer, a care-giver. To pour his life into the lives of others… who in turn, pour their lives into the lives of others… who in turn… well, you get the picture.

    More answers later!

  31. Sarah C.

    Grr…you totally ignored my questions….-tear-!

  32. Blair

    Sorry, Sarah. I didn’t do it on purpose!

    16) Besides the select few who you are inclined to always mention, has there ever been a student that you regret not getting to know?

    This may sound harsh, but probably not. I am sure that I have missed some incredible people who walked through my doors, but the fact is… I missed them, so I don’t know what I missed out on. I pray they remember me fondly and that I was able to speak into their lives in some way, but I can’t think of one that I really wanted to get to know and didn’t get a chance to.

    16 b)Are there any students that you have this year who you think have something (personality) that’s really unique, yet you just don’t know?

    All my kids are unique… some in a positive way, some in a negative way. :)

    From Chase:
    17) Why did you decide to grow your hair out?

    Well, as you can by looking at this photo, I have had long hair before. So the better question would be, why did you decide to grow your hair BACK out.

    There are three reasons:

    The Spiritual Reason
    There is only one haircut recorded in the bible. That dude woke weak, blind, and grinding somebody else’s corn. I have never ground corn, but I am pretty sure that if I ever do, I want it to be my corn.

    The Other Reason
    I have an ugly head. I tried short hair in high school. I even had a flat top at one point. (I also had a mullet at one point, but we aren’t going to discuss that here.) With a flat top, my head looks like a cantelope with a piece of rug on top. I once saw a fat guy with a shaved head, and I figured if he could pull that off, I could do it, too. I asked my bride about it, and she assured me that I couldn’t. In fact, I am pretty sure I heard her compare “the back of my fat head” with a “pack of Oscar Mayer Weiners.” Again, we aren’t going to discuss that here.

    The Real Reason
    ‘Cause I wanted to. ‘Nuff said.

    More answers later…

  33. Wesley a.k.a Grandma

    Who is your favorite male grandmother and why?

  34. Sarah C.

    Lol, I have learned to forgive….You got lucky there… :-P

  35. Blair

    From Jennifer:
    18) What would you say is the most fulfilling teaching experience you have had?

    Well, for today, it was seeing the light bulb go off when one of the students got the concept I was trying to teach. As a teacher, nothing beats that… seeing the look of sudden comprehension. That has to rank high on the list.

    On a personal level, it would have to be seeing the relationship deepen with a particular former student. Ten years ago, I enetered the classroom and taught her in the 8th grade. Since then, we have shared many of life’s milestones. When I married, she served my groom’s cake. When she married, I helped perform the service. I got to pray with her last night, in fact. She crossed the line from former student to little sister a long time ago. God has used me in her life, I think… and He has definitely used her in the lives of my family.

    And from none other than Spanky:
    19a) I have heard that your nickname is FLIG; what does that stand for? Is there more than one meaning?

    This is a very sordid tale. Last year, I was lucky enough to become friends with two great guys, both of whom happen to be Air Force fighter pilots (and one of whom posed this question knowing good and darn well the answer to it). We met weekly for breakfast, and not much time passed before I informed them that a guy named Blair couldn’t continue to meet with guys who preferred to be called by their nicknames: Spanky and Pooch.

    I had no idea what I was saying. I had no clue that there was a bona fide naming ceremony that I would get to participate in. When I say ceremony… I mean ceremony. Complete with dinner, a presentation, a heated discussion of possible names, the naming ceremony, and the ceremonial shot of Jeremiah Weed.

    Allow me to introduce you to a portion of the entertainment and discussion for the evening:

    Because of my somewhat rebellious nature, I suppose, Pooch and Spanky thought that a name inspired by William Wallace might be appropriate. After some discussion, this one was rejected.
    .
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    I really think the whole discussion about “Gizmo” or a similar gremlin-related nickname was due to hair envy. Let’s face it… these guys are military. They turned absolutely green with envy when they faced my gorgeous locks.
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    Okay, so I get this one. Like Sam Kinison, I am pastor. I am also loud. I also will drop the occasional salty word when I think it appropriate… or amusing… to do so. And Kinison played a loud teacher in the movie Back to School, so this seemed like a solid line of reasoning. But again, it just wasn’t quite what they were looking for.
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    I admit it, I am a pretty piece of flesh. A veritable treat for the eye. I grow weary of women throwing themselves at me in public. David Hasselhoff suffers a similar fate, I am sure. I am not sure why this one flopped, but it did.
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    But wait… Pooch had an epiphany. My hair… combined with my goatee… combined with my glasses… combined with my affinity for fried poultry… could it be?

    Yes, Colonel Sanders was the inspiration. After much discussion and a close vote, I was dubbed forevermore FLIG.

    Why FLIG, you ask? Finger LIcking Good, of course!
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    19b)Have you ever been fired from a job? If so, how many? More importantly, how many jobs have you NOT been fired from?

    I get fired from all of them, eventually. It’s my thing.

    19c) And finally, have you ever written a concise answer?
    Yes. See 19b.

    Final answers soon to come…

  36. Sarah C.

    ::sigh:: A classic… I hate to tell you, but I will never, EVER look at you the same way..
    -shudders- Oh, Mr. A……::sigh::

  37. GÜNTER

    so would i be terribly out of line if i started calling you flig instead of mr a?

  38. Pooch

    Gunter,
    I fear it would be poor form for you to call our esteemed Mr Andress by his tactical callsign of FLIG … unless you are willing to be put through the same crucible of a naming ceremony. Obviously Miranda was not very forthcoming with us to help with the naming ceremony, because my mind races with the names we could have divised after hearing the bald-noggin “like a pack of Oscar Meyer Weiners” line.

    This would definitely fall under the category of be careful what you wish for because you just might get it! I’ve never even met you, but the list of possible names has already begun to percolate in my brain…and I don’t even have Spanky’s help to get really good names right now.

    Cheers,
    Pooch

    PS – and if we had know about blowing up the car on a first date, Blair would not be know as FLIG. I’m not sure what it would’ve been, but while FLIG is good, we could have done better with that info!

  39. Shelbina

    Question #? – If it were acceptable for guys to paint their toenails…would you? and what color/pattern :)

    by-the-way…after reading all of the questions…people really want to know what you think about them?

  40. Heather

    I am laughing out loud at some of your answers – and some of the questions. I’m particularly fond of “do you ever give a concise answer?” Ha ha!!
    But the Tiffany-blowing up car story had me rolling! How did I miss that?? Guess it’s funnier when you know all the parties involved…

  41. audra

    “You see, I am convinced that the right place for any of us is the place where our greatest gifts meet the world’s greatest needs.”

    you, my friend, have it EXACTLY right. and i so needed to read this right now. :)

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